@Youngbill,
I dont use geofence but here are a couple of things to do...you need to set geofence for both inside and outside states...so click on your phone, then enter geofence and set the settings for entry, hold profile home....then click on exit geofence and select hold profile away. Also note that if you are using the geofence then you dont need the profiles to change in the schedule because you are basically overriding the schedule and changes profiles based on phone status..
In the app itself (at least in the droid app, there is an option to set the geofence radius, i think it has to be set to something other than off....
Make sure your wifes phone is set the same way...
Also, if the changes between home and away are only related to alerts you can accomplish the same thing with the traffic signal status...