Update: FIXED
MB came back from ASUS with notes on it saying they couldn't duplicate the problem. I began to suspect RAM again so I threw both sticks in my main PC (again) and got some actual memory specific BSOD's this time. Tested them individually and finally found one of the two 8GB sticks to be problematic. At this point, I said HOLY F%($#*% SH#$(%#, and other words.
Put the "good" stick back in BI PC and it's been running flawlessly for 4 or 5 days.
Previously, individually testing BOTH sticks gave me BSOD's. I can't explain that, or why my previous memtest results came back looking perfect. I can only guess that the bad stick of RAM was actively degrading throughout this process. No freaking clue.
Not sure if this has anything whatsoever to do with this, but I realized I had a kill-o-watt meter plugged in the wall, then battery backup into that, PC and a few other things plugged into battery backup. Watt meter was there a few weeks prior to these problems. Never even entered my mind that could cause problems whatsoever, but I've removed it and I now suspect that was a bad idea. Read some reviews where those things fry even when well under max loads. I would think battery backup would normalize anything weird from behind the battery backup, but I have come back to it beeping on 2 occasions. Just chalked it up to the battery backup getting old or under too much load maybe and I removed a couple small things from it.
Anyways, my fault for not thoroughly testing the RAM more. Some lessons were learned and I appreciate all the replies here - seriously made the trouble more bearable being able to discuss the problems.