U.S.—A new study has found that kids who got themselves shoved into lockers, toilets, and trash cans while in junior high and high school are finally getting a new career opportunity as Joe Biden's door-to-door vaccine monitors.
WASHINGTON, D.C.—Former President George W. Bush is pitching in to help President Biden celebrate the military's sudden victory in Afghanistan, breaking out his famous 'Mission Accomplished" banner from 18 years ago.
TOKYO—Women's sports are in danger as transwomen continue to dominate their biological female competitors. To fight this, a conservative lobbyist group has successfully petitioned the International Olympic Committee to add a new sport: competitive child birthing.