Funny / Satire

Growing up, my best friend was an adopted refugee from Vietnam named Do Chi Vi. His American name was Jimmy Do. Guess what his brothers name was? Yeap, John Do. And he was our HS president. Ha, ha.
 
A man was walking down the street and noticed a sign reading: "Hans Schmidt's Chinese Laundry." Being of a curious nature, he entered and was greeted by an obviously Oriental man who identified himself as Hans Schmidt.

"How come you have a name like that?" inquired the stranger.

The Oriental explained in very broken English that when he landed in America he was standing in the immigration line behind a German.

When asked his name, the German replied, "Hans Schmidt." When the immigration official asked the Oriental his name, he replied, "SAM TING."
 
Attended my daughter's graduation from junior high, circa 1994. It was pretty boring, listening to all the kids' names being called so they could come up and get their certificate until this young man's name was called...."Wee Dong." :lmao:

Was in a California Highway Patrol trailer in CA taking a defensive driving course required of City employees. On the way out I got a close look at certifications of Officer "Hunt" displayed on the wall..his first name was "Mike" ....you can put that together.

The names above were real but we haven't even touched on the fake names people put down so they sound funny when spoken, such as:
  • Phil Macracken
  • Heywood Jablowme
Who's got more?
 
We've all heard of Ben Dover but did ya know he has a sister named Ilene Dover ? :lmao:
 
Many years ago when manufacturing plants still had a public address system throughout the building and people got paged all of the time, we had a guy in our machinery maintenance dept who's real name was Richard Shaft. They used to page us to come to a certain department or machine as soon as it broke down. But he didn't go by Richard. He went by Dick. He was the head mechanic. He got paged a lot.
 
In a department store I worked in while in high school, the phone to the store went to a switchboard operator. Yes, I am that old. She would connect callers to department phones, but you could have customers paged and the operator would page them over the PA system and state 'dial operator'.

When a new girl would work at night (they were all girls at night), some of the stock boys would call into the store from a payphone in the automotive shop. Their conversation would go like this"

"Hi, my name is William Hurtz and I have a family emergency. I am trying to reach my brother Dick. He lives in Holden (Massachusetts). Could you page him, please?"

Then the store wide page would come across: "Dick Hurtz from Holden dial operator"
 
I worked with an Aisin technician at a Ford dealership named Phuc Lee. They would page him all the time on the intercom. "Fuck Lee, come to dispatch!"
I'm sure he was laughing every time they paged him. The correct pronunciation for Phuc in Vietnamese is "Foo", not Fuck! He never bothered correcting anyone. He probably enjoyed hearing his redneck coworkers cussing on the intercom every time they paged him! lol
 
  • Haha
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